An Interesting Day

So my friend had asked me last week or the week before if I was free today to join her on a march in Central London. With the G20 conference happening there have been quite a few demonstrations against all that is wrong with the world.

At the time I thought I had a test but it turned out that I had already done it last week. So with me being free, she asked me again if I wanted to tag along and I said okay.

I’ve never been on a protest so this was all new to me.

I must say I enjoyed it.

Everyone around me including my very passionate friend were screaming their heads off and I found it hard to as I’m not really a loud person generally. But being in a crowd like that gets you into the mood and even I started shouting. Twas quite fun.

It started in Grosvenor Square (which took ages to find as she messed up with map or something) and ended at Trafalgar Square where there were many lively and enthusiastic speakers.

What I found quite wonderful was the fact that most of the people were non-muslims protesting for the rights of Muslims around the world i.e. Iraq, Afghanistan and Palestine were the main ones mentioned.

I use the word loosely, but Asians in general love to complain but they don’t do much themselves to make a change. And that’s me included. We all have such a defeatist attitude which will never get us anywhere and nothing will ever happen thinking like that. We need to be more active, make more people aware about what’s happening and what’s wrong with the world and try and make some kind of difference, small or large. Slowly and surely it may help in some way.

That being said I don’t think protests make much difference to how the worlds run. That’s not to say I disagree or disregard them. I’m all for them as there has to be awareness for there to be a change in the first place. What I’m trying to say is look how many marched against the Iraq war? Did anything change? Not a bit.

The sad fact is that politicians will do what they want, when they want, regardless of what their people want. We are tricked into thinking we live in a democracy but we don’t. We elect them but we are always the losers no matter who is in power.

All in all quite an eye opening experience and one that I hope I’ll repeat some day.

One of the speakers was a rapper called LowKey who is from London. I’ve been checking out some of his tracks on Youtube and I must say I’m amazed at how good he is! His flow is brilliant, his lyrics are hard hitting and inspiring and he has raw talent. I hope he becomes massive as he could bring a big change on the scale of the 2pac if he had a chance as most of his lyrics are political and about making a change.

Anyways getting late.

Until next time.

Peace.

Lost in Myself

It’s not been the best of months.

Everything seems to not be going as well as I’d like it to be.

Uni, Friends, Job, Home.

I’ve only got a week left of Uni before we break up for the year. Then it’s just revision and exams to tackle. Though I do have a report to write up which is due in the middle of April.

But I’ve still got the problem.

I leave things too late. I shall not go into all that seeing as I already have in an earlier blog. I’ll tackle it somehow. Well I hope so.

The year has passed so quick it’s unbelievable. It’s odd though. While it feels like the year has gone by really quick, college days seem a distant memory now.

Uni is crap though. And not just because of the work. The work isn’t that bad really. Sure, I need to work harder and all but I don’t regret choosing Psychology. The content has been good, mostly engaging. Sure, some of the lecturers could liven it up to stop me falling asleep but as a whole the course is very good.

The problem I have with Uni is I have made no friends.

It is quite sad that I couldn’t in 19, end of next week it will be 20, weeks I couldn’t make one friend.

Sure I’ve talked to people and made acquaintances and had a laugh here and there.

But that isn’t friendship. I’d love to have someone I can call and ask if they want to hang out or something. But at the moment I feel so alone.

That’s partly why I’m annoyed with a few old friends. It isn’t always their fault. They have their own lives to lead and stuff and I’m not there anymore regularly so can’t expect them always to make time for me.

But what hurts is when I tell them I’m feeling shit and even after that nothing changes. Okay, I don’t expect you to spend a whole day with me. But is a few hours in a week going to kill you?

I told one of my friends my hearts contents, told her what she’d done wrong and she apologised. And I thought to myself  ‘Maybe this is a new beginning, Maybe she’s changed’. But no. She contacted me on Thursday night, a week and a bit later, to ask if I wanted to meet up.

Fuck you.

I could have but I was being stubborn so I didn’t and just said I wasn’t free.

Damn I do sound like a miserable twat but I’m just yearning for someone to be my friend for sake of wanting to be my friend rather then because they feel sorry for me.

So I guess it might be my fault.

Maybe I’m boring to hang out with. Maybe they feel like they can’t have fun with me.

I have noticed that I’m the friend people will talk to when they need a shoulder to cry on. I guess in a way that’s a compliment and I do have a knack of saying to people ‘I’m always here if you need to talk’ and I will always say that and will probably go on listening to people’s problems because that’s who I am.

That’s why I’m thinking of becoming a counsellor. I like to think I’d be quite good at it.

Anyways sometimes I’d like to be more then just that shoulder to cry on. I’d like to think I have a good personality so why don’t people want to be my friend?

Who knows.

As for family the sunday before last, me and Dad has massive argument. Well it was him doing the shouting more then me.

The reason?

I cut a bit of hair.

I trimmed my beard. Not massively. Just kind of cleaned it up a bit. To most people you’d have to focus really hard to really notice anythings changed but as he is on the look out he can spot it.

What ensued was totally out of proportion but not unexpected I suppose. He said I was spoilt and that memorising the Qur’aan was of no use because I trimmed my beard.

What took the piss was the fact he wasn’t as annoyed at me trimming my beard as he was about people seeing me. He said quite clearly ‘Don’t go to Mosque for 2 weeks. Someone will see you and you’ll lower my name’.

Lower your name?!

What kind of reasons that?!

If he had been pissed because of the Islamic side of things then I’d still be angry but I’d understand. But he’s pissed more because of what might people think. That takes the piss.

The worst bit of it all was that he blamed Mum for spoiling me. I guess I was a bit of a pussy when I walked out to house when he started shouting at me. I should have realised with me not there, he’d start shouting at my Mum.

My mum may have spoiled me here and there but she hasn’t messed me up in anyway. Shocking as it is, I have a brain.

I want to do what I want to do. That’s not to say I want to disrespect my parents but there comes a time in life when something small like trimming your beard shouldn’t be seen as a massive moral wrong.

Looking around there are many more messed up kids out there. I haven’t dealt drugs, got a girl pregnant, got in trouble with the police or anything even close to that.

All I did was cut a bit of hair.

Look at the bigger picture.

Anyways enough negativeness. Tis not healthy.

What’s been good about this month?

Well I’m still alive and well. Looking around the world and others heartwrenching stories, nothing massively bad has happened to me. We all, including me, really should complain less.

I started this post a few days ago and hoped to end it before the end of the month.

Again and unsurprisingly I failed again.

Anyways I think I should end this.

Take care.

Peace