Regret, Reflection and Reinvention

I used a triadic of alliterative abstract nouns in the title to try and grasp your attention.

I’d say something like that in an A-Level English piece of work. I do miss English at times. I can’t remember many times or many subjects where I was working on something that made me feel like my brain was working hard yet at the same time enjoying it a lot. Though I came out with a B it wasn’t really a hard subject, but it was one that needed you to use your brain. Application was key rather then merely remembering.

As well as trying to grasp your attention the title does actually have a meaning.

Today I found out that I didn’t actually have a class today, so had another whole day free. I felt really regretful that I didn’t work harder yesterday. If I’d been more assertive and less lazy, then I could have done a lot more yesterday and most probably could have finished it today and then only have 1 of the 2 courseworks left. But as mentioned yesterday, I failed.

This leads to me to reinvention. Yes, I know I’ve skipped reflection but I will get back to it. Not to worry for those whose blood pressure has now risen to dangerous levels because of the shock of the apparent omission.

Anyways I’m blabbling. Back to topic.

March is a busy month for me. I have many deadlines and much revision and reading to do for coursework and tests. I’d really like to shape up and try my utmost best to go through these in a reasonable manner without having to be overly stressed because I’ve left it all till the last minute. I’ve had these ‘I’m going to shape up’ moments many times in life and more often then not, I have failed to keep it up.  This time I really think it’s important I do, seeing as I would like to get into the second year with a decent grade. That would start me off with positivity and more confidence to be able to keep it up next year and the most important third.

My next deadline is next Thursday. A 1500 word essay. Not long at all and the topic I’ve chosen (Piaget’s cognitive theory of development) isn’t the hardest and there is so much information out there, I won’t be lacking at all in finding things. It is now up to me to get that info, write that essay and hand it in, in good time. I won’t have much time to relax, as I have 2 more deadlines in the following week so ideally I can get this one out the way as soon as possible and focus on them. We shall see.

I have been reflecting a lot lately. Being alone in Uni with barely anyone to talk to plus college friends being busy or just not being bothered, makes one reflective. I’ve been reflecting on just about anything. Family, friends, religon, future, wife, kids…

The other day  I was having lunch in Uni and was looking at others smiling and laughing and I thought to myself how wonderful it’d have been if my good friend Prithvi was here. I could imagine me googling at some hot woman who’d just walked in and her going ‘I wish I was gorgeous like that’ and me saying ‘Your beautiful as you are’ and her smiling and blushing while she gives me the ‘Are you blind?’ look. Then we’d walk around Uni singing Bollywood songs or recreating dialogue and scenes, and have lots of good times. How the heart yearns at times.

The heart will keep yearning and hopefully I will keep reflecting, expressing and typing.

Peace.

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